Sunday, March 21, 2010

Two ways

You can look at everything in two ways. For example, the cynical among you may think that I lost badly to a youngster whom I defeated last week in a game of tennis, almost so badly that I should be prevented from picking up a tennis racquet again. The other way to look at it would be that I built character today, learned how to look at defeat as objectively as victory, understood that winning is not the ultimate goal, participating is.

Those who look at the episode on the tennis court this morning in the second way are my true friends. Those who choose to be pessimistic, obnoxious, negative and severely juvenile by thinking of the whole thing the first way, consider the following:

o When I am successful and am invited to a party held to celebrate my spectacularly brilliant success, you will not be on the list. While you stand in the line outside the posh night-club where people throw a glitzy party in my honour while people who were insightful and intelligent to think of this morning's experience in the second manner are ushered inside the club by comely escorts and offered a choice of champagne and kokum sharbat at the entrace, think whether it was worth being so petty.

o When I am so successful that it almost should be illegal and you are not and I am travelling with my posse of admirers, body-guards and general populace truly in love with me, while you are sweating the sweltering heat at the side of the road, forcefully restrained at that location by the police till my cavalcade passes, you will surely wonder whether I would have spotted you in the crowd, stopped the procession and given you a ride in ultimately luxurious vehicle that I happen to be travelling in if only you had thought of the unmentionable incident of this morning in the second way.

All I am saying is that there are two ways of looking at everything, and it never hurts to look at things in a positive way.

Sunday, March 14, 2010

Take that, age 22

Good: I played two hours of tennis under a scorching Sun, with a guy 14 years younger to me (and who supposedly played the state circuit). Started by knocking the ball around followed by a set, which I won 6-2.

Bad: My whole body will be sore all day today and tomorrow while he will sail through the way an annoying 22 year old is likely to.

Ugly: Did not even make the cut last year. However, I will win this year because fighter hamesha jeetta hai.

Monday, December 21, 2009

Hazards of being an entrepreneur

Apart from the obvious risk of losing all your money, the only occupational hazard of being an entrepreneur is running the chance of getting so immersed in your work that you forget to enjoy life (which in turn leads to lack of enjoyment at work).

It is inevitable, but surmountable. I just came out of an 18 month long funk which gradually, yet completely, occupied my life leaving me thinking about only work and more work. However, I am back you people, so let's start with a German joke I heard at a party on Saturday:

Q. Why did the chicken cross the road?
A. To die. In the snow.


Wednesday, May 20, 2009


This is for today. Today, I hope you read this.

If today came up to me in a pub and tried to pick on me while I was sitting on a stool drinking my pale-ale (which I really like, BTW -- the ale, not the stool), I would punch it in the face (today, that is, not the stool or the ale). It would not matter if today was accompanied by yesterday and tomorrow, even if I could really get screwed by tomorrow. Today has got on my nerves and it definitely has no business disturbing me while I sip my pale-ale. I would, however, be wary of yesterday, as it would be behind me. The wise thing to do would be to drag today into the bathroom and beat the crap out of it -- even if it called for help, tomorrow would never come.

Monday, May 18, 2009

Toughness is overrated

When the going gets tough, why doesn't everybody just go to sleep? It really works very well for me. In fact, just to make sure that I am prepared for tough times, I go to sleep randomly, every now and then.

Thursday, April 23, 2009

Stand by me

Some of you people are too darn adamant and won't let me retire in peace from the illustrious blogging career that I had. When will you realize that I suffer for you, dear readers, day and night, sleeping and awake? Why is that not enough for you? Even Curious Gawker, my favourite blogger by far, takes two hours between consecutive posts, so how can I be expected to write every two months?

Anyway, came across this beautiful video at Boing Boing (for those three of you who do not follow that blog). Enjoy.

And yes, regular programming resumes today, which means that the next post should be out anytime in 2011. Hold your breath.

Thursday, December 11, 2008

Game show

I have thought of a new game show which I am sure will be a massive hit, given the kind of sadistic pleasure people get out of seeing others make fools of themselves.

This is the game format:

Each contestant will be asked to choose from between two cages inside which the person can not see. One cage will have a nice birdie. The other one a wild beast. If the contestant chooses the bird, he/she gets a big amount of money and the bird. Otherwise the beast eats the contestant.

This is all I have so far. And yes, the name too. The show will be called "Parinda ya darinda".

Saturday, September 20, 2008


So you think you are better than me because you visited this blog many times since July 2, only to find that I had not updated it! Well, I have news for you sunshine: you are right. I am sorry. Please come back. Shower me with the same love and affection that you had in your free time a year back. I need those five minutes of your time again, the five minutes which you spend reading the crap here and getting convinced that sleep was not that bad an option. I miss you.

If pleading is not enough to get you back in my life, would it help you to know that I will undergo a life altering change in two days? In two days. That is not so far away. In fact, it will be after two days from now that most of you will read this post and regret the fact that your sympathies were not with me in times of need. A lot can happen in two days, Einstein, and here is a list of possible things which can happen in two days (just to drive the point home, really, but please remember that this is not an exhaustive list of things that can happen in two days):

1. Childbirth (if you have done the needful in the past year or so).
2. Lehman Brothers meltdown.
3. A Cricket test match between India and Australia.
4. Your turn to be attended at the enquiry window of a government office.

Now, to come to the life altering change mentioned earlier in the post -- I am scheduled to undergo surgery to replace a torn ligament in my right knee on Monday morning. Now, do you feel bad? I didn't think so. :(

Why are you still here, then?

If it is you, Reliance Communication, then please be aware that I am not paying your outstanding bill till you call and apologize for the fake charges on the internet bill that you sent me. Not just that, I am now transmitting all my IP packets through your friend, Tata Communications. We've been at it for four months now and I am very happy with him/her (choose one to suit your sexual orientation). He/she cares for my packets. He/she keeps track of them and accounts for them well.

If it is you, Roger Federer, keeping a tab on whether I am still singing your praises, please rest assured that you are in my thoughts at least once each waking hour. Well done at NYC, keep it up, and what's with all the paranoia? I was a fan a year back, I am a fan now, so stop worrying and concentrate on the important things (like more Grand Slam titles, as we really need to get past Pete soon).

If it is you, Mom/Dad, all those rumours about being a gay, drunk, drug-addict are totally baseless. Tata Communications is just a friend.

If you are not Reliance/Roger/Mom/Dad, then I am sorry. Maybe I came across a little harsh earlier. I will be in hospital for a few days, then come out and walk with the help of a crutch for a month, but will be fit and firing in nine months' time. That's perfectly in time for the 2010 Mumbai half-marathon training. See you there.

I am sleepy.


Wednesday, July 02, 2008

A very good way to spend four and a half minutes of your life

Watch this video. I came across this when surfing BoingBoing. One of the best videos I have seen of late.

Where the Hell is Matt? (2008) from Matthew Harding on Vimeo.

Monday, May 19, 2008

I'm excited